A Tale of Three Schooling Journeys: How I Supported Each Child's Path

As a parent, I have had the privilege of experiencing schooling with each of my three children. Each one has had a unique journey, filled with its own challenges and triumphs. Through these experiences, I have come to realise that as adults, we often get caught up in our own hopes, dreams, and aspirations for our children, instead of truly supporting them and allowing them to confidently choose their own paths.

With my oldest child, he had the benefit of staying home with my mom for the first couple of years and started pre-schooling later than usual and initially, it was a breeze. At primary school I realised that there was an underlying tone of insecurity and at the same time, as a first time mom, I trusted schools, teachers and principals opinions, expertise and advice which led to medicating him so that he could "keep up, focus" and fit in. As he progressed through his schooling years, also having to process life and the choices that we, the adults, made, I noticed that he was becoming increasingly stressed and anxious. It wasn't until he opened up to me and expressed his desire to drop the meds that I realized I had been imposing my own (and others') expectations on him.  

I moved him to a smaller school where he received individual attention and after a few years, I learned that not every child is an academic - nor do they have to be.  I learned that some children are sensory children, meaning, they are sensitive to all 6 senses, including tone of voice and amongst many other lessons, I learned to trust my gut over the advice from people who choose the department of education's expectations over the child's holistic wellbeing.  It was a constant battle between us as I tried to mold him into a model student. But as he grew older, I began to see the value in his questioning and realized that perhaps the traditional schooling system was not the best fit for him. With the support of his headmaster and to his relief, I felt at ease taking him out of school in his second last year.  I decided to explore alternative forms of education, such as homeschooling and online courses, which allowed him to learn at his own pace and in his own way. He has since blossomed into a confident and independent young man and I am grateful for the opportunity to support him in finding his own path.

My middle child, on the other hand, is a social butterfly and started pre-school at 5 weeks old. She's a natural academic and has a passion for studying. She is also a free spirit, questioning the rules and boundaries set by her teachers. 

With my youngest child, I have learned to take a more hands-off approach. I have come to understand that each child is unique and has their own strengths and interests. Instead of imposing my own expectations, I have encouraged her to explore her passions and choose her own educational path. It has been a joy to watch her grow and develop her own sense of self as she navigates through different schooling options and discovers what works best for her.

Through my personal experiences of schooling with each of my children, I have learned that it is crucial to support and guide them rather than trying to control their every move. By allowing them the freedom to choose and make their own decisions, I have seen them flourish and become confident individuals. As adults, it is our responsibility to provide a nurturing environment for our children to grow and develop, rather than imposing our own expectations upon them. Ultimately, it is their lives and their future, and we must trust in their abilities to pave their own paths towards success and fulfillment.